man seemingly frustrated

๐—ง๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ด๐—ต ๐—ฆ๐˜๐—ฎ๐—ธ๐—ฒ๐—ต๐—ผ๐—น๐—ฑ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜€? ๐—›๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฒโ€™๐˜€ ๐—›๐—ผ๐˜„ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ช๐—ผ๐—ฟ๐—ธ ๐˜„๐—ถ๐˜๐—ต ๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—บ (๐—ช๐—ถ๐˜๐—ต๐—ผ๐˜‚๐˜ ๐—Ÿ๐—ผ๐˜€๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ฌ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐— ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฑ)

June 05, 2025โ€ข1 min read

Every STEM leader has them.

The stakeholder who constantly shifts priorities.

The one who pokes holes in your data like itโ€™s a competitive sport.

Or the one who replies to your well-thought-out proposal with: โ€œHmm, Iโ€™m just not feeling it.โ€

๐—ฆ๐˜๐—ฎ๐—ธ๐—ฒ๐—ต๐—ผ๐—น๐—ฑ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜€ ๐—ฐ๐—ฎ๐—ป ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ ๐—ฑ๐—ถ๐—ณ๐—ณ๐—ถ๐—ฐ๐˜‚๐—น๐˜ - ๐—ฏ๐˜‚๐˜ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐˜†โ€™๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ฎ๐—น๐˜€๐—ผ ๐—ฒ๐˜€๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜๐—ถ๐—ฎ๐—น. So how do you work with them without going full passive-aggressive in a project update?

Start with curiosity over combat.

๐Ÿ“Œ ๐—Ÿ๐—ถ๐˜€๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ป ๐—ฝ๐—ฎ๐˜€๐˜ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ป๐—ผ๐—ถ๐˜€๐—ฒ. Sometimes what feels like resistance is really fear, confusion, or their own pressure talking. Ask whatโ€™s ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ๐—ต๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฑ their concerns.

๐Ÿ“Œ ๐—ฆ๐—ฝ๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—ธ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ถ๐—ฟ ๐—น๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ด๐˜‚๐—ฎ๐—ด๐—ฒ. You may be fluent in systems architecture, but they may only care about risk, timeline, or cost. Make your communication hit their priorities, not just yours.

๐Ÿ“Œ ๐—ฆ๐—ฒ๐˜ ๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ป๐—ฑ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ฒ๐˜€ - ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐˜€๐—ฝ๐—ฒ๐—ฐ๐˜๐—ณ๐˜‚๐—น๐—น๐˜†. Being collaborative doesnโ€™t mean being a doormat. If scope creep is wrecking your timeline, itโ€™s OK to say, โ€œWe can add that, but it will push delivery by two weeks. Are we aligned on that?โ€

๐Ÿ“Œ Donโ€™t take it personally. Difficult doesnโ€™t mean malicious. Theyโ€™re likely under pressure too. Center yourself in facts, not frustration.

๐Ÿ“Œ ๐—•๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐˜€๐—ผ๐—น๐˜‚๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜€, ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜ ๐—ท๐˜‚๐˜€๐˜ ๐—ฟ๐—ผ๐—ฎ๐—ฑ๐—ฏ๐—น๐—ผ๐—ฐ๐—ธ๐˜€. If somethingโ€™s stuck, show youโ€™ve thought through options. This builds trust and positions you as a partner, not a problem.

And hereโ€™s the truth: working well with difficult stakeholders isnโ€™t just about keeping the peace. ๐—œ๐˜โ€™๐˜€ ๐—ต๐—ผ๐˜„ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐—ด๐—ฟ๐—ผ๐˜„ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ณ๐—น๐˜‚๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ฐ๐—ฒ. When you can stay steady, empathetic, and effective under pressure, people notice.

๐˜Œ๐˜น๐˜ฆ๐˜ค๐˜ถ๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ท๐˜ฆ ๐˜ค๐˜ฐ๐˜ข๐˜ค๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ ๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜ฑ๐˜ด ๐˜š๐˜›๐˜Œ๐˜” ๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ฅ๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ๐˜ด ๐˜ฃ๐˜ถ๐˜ช๐˜ญ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฎ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ๐˜ด๐˜ฆ๐˜ต ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ค๐˜ฐ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฎ๐˜ถ๐˜ฏ๐˜ช๐˜ค๐˜ข๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ด๐˜ฌ๐˜ช๐˜ญ๐˜ญ๐˜ด ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ฏ๐˜ข๐˜ท๐˜ช๐˜จ๐˜ข๐˜ต๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฆ๐˜ท๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ต๐˜ณ๐˜ช๐˜ค๐˜ฌ๐˜ช๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ต ๐˜ด๐˜ต๐˜ข๐˜ฌ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ญ๐˜ฅ๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ๐˜ด - ๐˜ธ๐˜ช๐˜ต๐˜ฉ ๐˜ค๐˜ญ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ช๐˜ต๐˜บ ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ค๐˜ฐ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฑ๐˜ฐ๐˜ด๐˜ถ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ. ๐˜๐˜ตโ€™๐˜ด ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฐ๐˜ต ๐˜ข๐˜ฃ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ต ๐˜ข๐˜ท๐˜ฐ๐˜ช๐˜ฅ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ ๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ค๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ๐˜ท๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ๐˜ด๐˜ข๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ๐˜ด - ๐˜ช๐˜ตโ€™๐˜ด ๐˜ข๐˜ฃ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ต ๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ๐˜ญ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฎ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ต๐˜ต๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ.

Sylke is a business consultant and executive advisor who works with STEM business leaders and professionals in STEM roles when they want to exceed the expectations of their stakeholders and their own.

Sylke Chesterfield, CEC

Sylke is a business consultant and executive advisor who works with STEM business leaders and professionals in STEM roles when they want to exceed the expectations of their stakeholders and their own.

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